Divorce almost always changes the structure of the family, but this doesn’t mean parenting responsibilities just end. Making sure you stay as involved as possible for the sake of your children is super important. Luckily, California law encourages frequent and consistent contact with both parents as long as it’s in the best interest of the child and their safety. Overall, successful co-parenting is what helps children feel safe and loved throughout the entire divorce process.
Putting Children’s Needs First
Make sure you avoid reacting in emotionally heightened states when it comes to your spouse. This will only make your case look bad when it comes to handling custody with your children. Minimizing conflict and remaining focused on your child is the best way to operate throughout the divorce.
It’s important that you don’t use your child as a messenger or involve them in any disputes going on between you and your spouse. Not only is this mentally unhealthy for the child but can also severely backfire on you in the courtroom. Continuously reassuring your child that both you and your spouse love them and that the divorce is not their fault will only help aid them during this difficult time.
Keeping California law in mind, the court exclusively operates keeping the best interests of the child at the focal point of the divorce. That’s why following its lead and doing the same thing whenever you can, will do wonders for your case.
Follow the Parenting Plan and Any Court Orders
The purpose of parenting plans is to outline holiday schedules, custody agreements, and any type of decision-making that pertains to the child. Following the court orders is essential in making sure that your portion of childcare lasts long term. This also prevents unnecessary conflict between you and your spouse as long as you both abide by the rules.
If you run into any situations where changes are needed, make sure they are done formally with the courts and not through informal or casual agreements between the two of you.
Communicate Clearly, Respectfully, and in Writing
The purpose of handling yourself well when it comes to communication is to minimize conflict and any misunderstandings. Keeping it as brief and factual as possible while focusing on the needs of the child is how you are most likely to succeed.
Nowadays, there are plenty of useful tools using written communication and co-parenting apps, such as OurFamilyWizard, that can be used to document schedules, decisions, and any other forms of communication between you and your spouse.
The main importance for having these interactions documented in written format is that they can prove to be helpful if any disputes rise at a later time.
Supporting Your Child’s Relationship with the Other Parent

In most cases, children benefit from having strong relationships with both parents, and California law reflects that by promoting frequent contact. Supporting your child’s relationship with their other parent can promote emotional stability and maturity while limiting long-term conflict. However, this expectation only applies when it’s safe and appropriate.
In situations involving domestic violence or abuse, courts will typically limit or completely restrict contact in order to protect the well-being of the child. In these specific circumstances, you as a parent should follow the court’s rules carefully and prioritize safety above all else. Seeking the right legal guidance can also help ensure that all arrangements regarding parenting is keeping the child’s best interests in mind.
Seeking Legal Representation
This entire process can be emotionally exhausting and overwhelming. Taking proactive steps early on can help protect both your well-being and your child’s best interests. Men’s Legal Center in San Diego is a team of experienced family attorneys that are here to help you by supporting both you and your children throughout the divorce. Make sure you contact them as soon as possible for your free case review.
