Mother’s Day is a special time for mothers and children to enjoy together. Unfortunately, divorced men may feel pulled in different directions on this important day. For example, you may want to spend time with your own mother, along with your children, but realize that it is important for your kids to have time with their mom.
The divorce attorneys at Men’s Legal Center know that divorce is not just about what happens on paper. It is also about your struggles to maintain a normal environment for your kids after the divorce is final. Here are some tips on handling holidays like Mother’s Day with a minimum amount of conflict.
- Realize it is “just a day.” Mother’s Day did not even exist until 1914, when it was designated to be the second Sunday in May. However, this is simply an arbitrary date set for convenience. You can celebrate “Mother’s Day” with your mom and your children any day of the year. Why not plan to have a special “Mother’s Day” celebration with your mom and kids the first Sunday in May if that is the weekend you have your children?
- Help your children honor their mother. It may be difficult to feel friendly toward your ex. However, she is still the mother of your children, and you set a good example, both for your kids and your ex, by treating Mother’s Day with respect. Help your children pick out a nice card or gift to take to their mother on this day. If they happen to be with you on Mother’s Day, allow them to call their mom to wish her a happy day.
- Avoid “trash talk” about your former spouse. Not only around Mother’s Day but every day of the year, avoid speaking negatively about your ex to your children. This is extremely harmful for the kids and will ultimately hurt their relationship with you. Even if their mother is a very bad parent, never engage in “trash talk” about her with your children or force them to agree that she is wrong in any argument with you.
If you are struggling with divorce issues, including separation, property settlement, child custody and support or alimony, talk to the experienced attorneys at Men’s Legal Center. We are ready to help you smooth the transition into your single life and meet the challenges that are inherent in any divorce.